


we could have forever if we tried

by waywardaussies



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Carnival AU, M/M, luke has a thing for ringleaders, this is my first time posting on ao3 so be easy on me omfg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-27
Updated: 2015-03-27
Packaged: 2018-03-19 22:44:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3627033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardaussies/pseuds/waywardaussies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The carnival is a place of wonder, magic, and excitement. But for Luke, the carnival is a place where he gets to see the cute ringleader.</p>
<p>or Ashton is the ringleader to a carnival, and Luke just might have a thing for guys in costume.</p>
            </blockquote>





	we could have forever if we tried

**Author's Note:**

> oh my goodness I'm finally using ao3!
> 
> so this is a fic that i made a while ago and i worked really hard on it and i hope you guys like it :)

When Luke was 8, his mother took him and his two older brothers to the carnival for the first time. The lights, the sounds, the smells, everything about the carnival Luke loved; it was like a sensory overload for a small boy with a big imagination. But the one thing that Luke loved the most was the ringleader’s segment. A tall man wearing knee high boots, black baggy pants, and a long red coat, holding a long whip and sporting a top hat on his head would call out into the crowd of people, voice filled with such confidence and charisma. Luke stared wide-eyed at the center of the tent, watching the man’s every move with fascination and wonder.

And when the next segment came on, Luke lost interest. For some reason, people walking on stilts and elephants on their hind legs didn’t spark Luke’s interest like how the ringleader did. His mother didn’t understand why Luke would sit back into his seat, slouching a bit during the other acts, but was instantly on the edge of his seat when the ringleader was standing in front of him. To his mother, Luke wasn’t interested in the carnival whatsoever, so after that one time, they never went back.

It wasn’t until 10 years later that Luke went back to the carnival. His best friends, Calum and Michael, wanted to do something special for their “friend-versary” (they’ve been best friends for almost 5 years and always liked to do something fun and exciting on their day their friendship formed). They were stumped with ideas, feeling that they have done practically everything best friends can do, until Calum’s face lit up and he turned to the other two boys, holding a flyer that read:

COME SEE THE CARNIVAL!

OPEN FOR THIS WEEK ONLY

$15 ENTRANCE FEE

“Guys, let’s go here!” Calum exclaims happily. Michael rubbed his chin in thought and Luke already made up his mind, nodding his head quickly towards his colorful headed friend. As Michael weighted the pros and cons of going, Luke took the flyer from Calum’s hands, reading over it and looking at the colorful picture that took up the entire background of the flyer. It had a lot of the acts on it, but what caught his eye was the middleman, dressed in the ringleader outfit and whip tightly held in his hand.

Luke didn’t recognize the man’s face, obviously a different man, but for some reason, Luke was more intrigued by this ringleader than the old one. This one seemed to have brown curly hair that came out at the bottom of the top hat, and bright hazel eyes that seemed to go straight through Luke, causing the blonde boy to shiver a bit. He wasn’t even paying attention to Calum’s whining, begging Michael to say yes to the carnival. But when Michael finally said yes, Calum cheered, jumping on the boy’s back and starting kissing his cheek in a joking yet happy manner. Michael tried getting the boy off of him, and Luke couldn’t stop himself from smiling.

The carnival was going on from Friday night until Wednesday afternoon, so the boy decided to go on Saturday since it was their friend-versary that day. Luke couldn’t contain his excitement any longer, Calum too was excited, saying how he went to a carnival with his dad a few years ago and his favorite part was the guy that got shot out the canon. Luke just nodded, feeling too embarrassed to admit that the only thing he loves about the carnival was the ringleader.

When they got there, the boys got loads of candy and snacks, Michael buying 2 bags of popcorn just for himself, and they decided to walk around for a bit before the show. There was assigned seats, so there was no stress in getting there really early for a good spot. Calum made sure that they got great seats, sitting right in the front. As they walked around, they heard a lot of children cheering and screaming with glee. The boys, being as curious as they were, decided to go and find out what the commotion was about.

When they turned the corner of the tent, Luke could feel his heart beat quickly in his chest. There, standing right before them, was the ringleader. Calum nudged Luke with a smile. “Would you look at that! He gives meet and greets! We should go over!”

“Are you serious?! There’s a bunch of little kids there. We’d look like pedophiles.” Michael argued, stuffing his face with a handful of his popcorn. Luke just stood there, not moving, eyes wide with fascination. Not only was the man a ringleader, but he was a beautiful ringleader. The picture on the flyer didn’t do this man justice. His curly hair was wild, but tamed under the top hat. His eyes glowed under the lights of the tent, practically sparkling. And his face… Luke could see dimples on both of his cheeks, and when he smiled wide, they caved in so deep Luke believed they could hold the world.

“Luke…? Luke!” Calum yelled at the tall boy, snapping him out of the daydream he was just in.

“Wh-What?” Luke asked, still a bit dazed. Calum and Michael gave each other knowing looks before turning to their best friend.

“You so have the hots for the ringleader!!” Michael teased, poking Luke’s own dimple as Luke swatted his hand away.

“I-I don’t… It’s just… he’s so… and I…” Luke tried to say, but his friends kept their knowing look, so Luke stopped trying and sighed. “I hate you guys.”

“Go talk to him!” Calum said, putting his hand on Luke’s back and pushed him towards the ringleader. Luke tried to stop himself from going any further, but his long legs betrayed him as he stumbled and fell on the floor. He quickly bounced back up, hoping that no one saw him. Unfortunately, when Luke looked over at the ringleader again, he could see him laughing, obviously seeing what just happened. Luke’s face turned beet red, spinning around so his back was towards the beautiful boy and glared at his friends, who couldn’t stop laughing.

“Smooth Hemmings, real smooth.” Michael joked, laughing so hard he had to hold his sides. Luke rolled his eyes and turned to sneak one last peak at the ringleader, seeing that he was looking right at Luke with a small smile. Luke smiled back then turned to pull his laughing friends into the tent as they made their way to their seats.

They boys chatted for a bit as they waited for the show to begin. Once the lights went down, the boys silenced and their attention was drawn to the center of the tent, where a single spotlight shone down and the ringleader stood there, costume and all. His smile was wide as the crowd cheered and Luke couldn’t stop staring.

“Ladies, gentlemen, children, and others. I would like to say welcome to the Irwin Family Carnival. I will be your ringleader, Mr. Irwin, and tonight you will see things that will fascinate you, intrigue you, maybe even make you a bit scared. But fear not! My lovely acts are well trained and specialize in making your imagination wander!” Mr. Irwin turned to his left, his whip in his left hand as the first act came on. “Here we have the beautiful Canstantina and her pet lion and they are going to be doing some tricks for you. Enjoy!” And with a twist of his wrist, the whip cracked in the air, the crowd cheered, and Luke’s eyes filled with fondness.

Just like last time, Luke was unfazed by the lion trick, mostly waiting for Mr. Irwin to come back. After 5 minutes of the lion trick, Mr. Irwin came back, his smile bright and vibrant like before, and Luke could feel his heart race in his chest as he watched the man crack his whip at the lion, getting him to do more tricks. Calum and Michael were laughing at the silly tricks Mr. Irwin was making the lion do, but Luke never took his eyes off the man.

“Now, we have the elephants!” the ringleader cheered, motioning towards the entrance were the elephants walked into the circle on their hind legs. Michael seemed to like that one cause his mouth dropped open and he kept nudging Calum, saying, “Holy shit did you see that?! How do they do it?!”

Time passed and Luke’s eyes were filling with such fondness as he watched the ringleader do his thing in the center of the tent. It was like he was a magnet and Luke was drown to him, to his motions, to his smile, to his eyes. Suddenly, Mr. Irwin turned towards where Luke and his friends sat, his eyes locking with the blonde’s as he gave him a small smile. And not the smile he’s been doing all night, a different kind of smile. One that Luke loved more because it showed that he was a human being. Luke just smiled back and gave him a small wave, just a tiny gesture. But that tiny gesture must have done something to the ringleader, cause he smiled wider. But it didn’t last long cause he turned to face the other side of the ring, leaving Luke in awe.

Sadly the event ended, but not before Mr. Irwin went back to the center of the tent, arms stretched out towards the people as they cheered. He gave one half of the room a bow, then turned around to the other half—where Luke was—and did the same. The only thing he did different was that when he came up from his bow, he looked eyes with Luke and winked. Luke felt his face heat up, already feeling his friends’ nudging as Mr. Irwin bowed one last time and the lights went out. When they came back on, he was gone, disappeared into the darkness.

“Luke! Did he just… Oh my God he did!!” Calum rambled, his face lit up as he continued to jump in his seat from second hand happiness. “He winked at you!! Mr. Irwin has the hots for you!! Oh my God!”

“Calum would you calm down! You’re worse than a child!” Luke reprimanded his friend, yet at the same time blushed harder cause Mr. Irwin winked at him.

“You have to go find him now!” Michael instructed as the boys got up to leave the tent.

“You’re insane! What makes you think that he would want to even see me?!” Luke complained, his negativity getting the best of him. Luke was a true pessimistic, always thinking the worse out of situations, and this one was just another one of those situtations.

“Cause he fucking winked at you! And before he giggled at you when you tripped. He giggled!! You made a grown man giggle, that has to tell you something!” Calum argues, him and Michael on the look out for the ringleader. Luke wanted to stop them, but part of him wanted to see the man as well. Something about the ringleader gave Luke chills that ran down his spine. And his smiles made his stomach do back flips. There was so much about the man that Luke loved, even after only a short period of time.

It wasn’t until they turned the corner of the tent that they ran into the person they wanted to see. Mr. Irwin backed away quickly, not wanting to completely collide into the unknown person, and quickly apologized as he looked up, where he smiled shyly and looked back down at the ground. Luke just chuckled lightly, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as his two friends patted his back and walked away, leaving Luke and Mr. Irwin alone.

“I-uh didn’t mean to bother you.” Luke said softly, not knowing if his stupid friends pushing him into the ringleader angered the man in any way. He probably got a bunch of crazy people following him and didn’t want Luke to be anywhere near him at the moment. But despite everything Luke’s mind believed, Mr. Irwin smiled and shook his head.

“No, don’t worry about it. It’s my fault, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” Luke was surprised at how deep Mr. Irwin’s voice was. Before when he was screaming, it seemed higher, but being this close to him and him not having to scream, it was deep and Luke tried to ignore the sensation he felt go through his body.

“I-I-uh, I loved the show. It was amazing, you… you were amazing.” Luke said, noticing how Mr. Irwin’s face flushed at the compliment.

“Thanks, I normally don’t get people complimenting me. They usually find the actual acts more interesting than the guy who just presents them.”

“Well I actually liked you the best,” Luke said suddenly, catching his words as he sputtered the next out in panic. “I mean you were great! I liked watching you… present and stuff.” The ringleader smiled widely, his hand coming out between the two of them.

“I’m Ashton.” He said and for a moment, Luke had to remember that “Mr. Irwin” wasn’t his real name. he chuckled to himself as he took the hand and shaking it a bit.

“Luke.” He said, giving Ashton a small smile. They pulled their hands away, an awkward silence filling the space between them. They were still really close, neither of them bothering to step back a bit. But once Luke noticed this, he went to back up a bit, but tripped over his own feet and felt his legs give out from under him.

“Whoa!” Ashton called out, quickly reaching forward to catch the clumsy boy.

Once Luke felt Ashton’s hands on his waist, he froze, not knowing exactly what to do or what to say. So instead, Luke chuckled again and got himself to his feet on his own, rubbing the back of his neck again.

"Sorry. I’ve got long legs that have a mind of their own half the time." Luke said. Ashton didn’t mind though, he just smiled and shrugged.

"It’s ok. If it helps, I’ve got abnormally long fingers that have a tendency to get stuck in things." Ashton said with a chuckle. Before they knew it, it was closing time and Luke had to leave. He pouted at the man he had the honor to talk to and he saw that Ashton was upset as well.

"Would it be too forward to ask you out?" Luke said confidently but when Ashton started to giggle, he quickly took back his words. "Like, you don’t have to. And it won’t be a date just a hang out. Unless you want it to be a date, then I can call it a date. But it’s comple—“ Ashton pressed his pointer finger (which was very long, like he said) against Luke’s lips, silencing the rambling boy.

"I’d love to go on a date with you." And that’s all Luke needed to hear for his face to spilt into a grin. They traded phone numbers and soon Luke left. But not before he turned back to face Ashton, giving the man a smile and a wave. Ashton returned the smile but also winked, causing Luke’s face to turn deep red.

~*~

The next day, Luke and Ashton texted each other all day. Their conversations didn’t even make any sense after a while, they went from talking about their favorite movies, to talking about things they liked to do—which lead to Luke saying he plays guitar and Ashton said he’d love to hear him play—and they talked more about that date, wanting to see each other badly (yet neither of them said it, in fear that the other would be freaked out).

They decided to go to the coffee shop that was around the corner from the carnival, seeing that Ashton didn’t know his way around Sydney that well, and Luke didn’t want to take Ashton anywhere that he’d feel lost or uncomfortable. They planned to meet each other there in an hour, which gave Luke little to no time to get himself ready, wanting himself to look as good as he could. He decided on wearing his “Go All The aWay” muscle tee and his black skinny with holes where his knees are. He styled his hair in the normal quiff, checking to see that his lip ring wasn’t dirty, and put on his all black Converse.

Soon, the hour was up and it was time for him to make his way over to the coffee shop. He hopped into his car, driving over to the place, where he saw Ashton standing outside of the coffee shop, his hands deep inside the front pockets of his skinny jeans. He was wearing a Nirvana baseball style tee-shirt with multiple holes in it, but for some reason Luke loved it. It was weird seeing Ashton in normal clothes, since Luke has only seen him in the ringleader costume. Luke pulled in front of the place, getting out of his car and locking the door. When he made his way over to Ashton, he couldn’t stop the smile that grew on his face.

“Hey.” Ashton said with a smile. He then bit his lip in a nervous way, fiddling with his fingers as he looked down at his feet. “I’m sorry I was really early. I hope you don’t think I’m some crazed person that waited out here for you for an hour. I just got here like 5 minutes ago, I just thought I’d walk and I didn’t realize how close it was.”

“Don’t worry about it. I don’t think badly of you for being early, trust me. When you have two friends that are late for everything, you appreciate someone being early for once.” Luke said, reaching over to open the door for Ashton, gesturing his hand for Ashton to walk in first. The man blushed deeply.

“Such a gentleman.” He said with a chuckle.

“I try.” Luke shrugged, laughing at his fake nonchalant response. They made their way over to a table, sitting across from one another and looking at the small menu the place had, which listed a bunch of coffees and cappicinos that Luke didn’t care to know the name of. He just usually drank his coffee black, maybe adding some sugar. However, he likes this place because they have really good cookies and treats that Luke loves to get. When he was younger, he and his brothers would come here all the time to get the place’s famous sugar cookies. Luke might just have Ashton try it. A lady soon came over, asking the boys what they wanted. Luke got the black coffee while Ashton got a regular coffee with milk and one sugar.

“Coming right up boys!” the waitress said with a smile, then turned to leave the boys alone once again.

“So,” Ashton started, putting the menu down and leaning forward so his elbows were on the table, then rested his head in his hands and gave the blonde boy a lazy smile. “Tell me about yourself. It’s not common for me to see cute boys at the carnival. There’s mostly little kids or old men that are classified pedophiles.” Luke couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his lips, shaking his head.

“Well, I’m 18, I’m currently attending a local college here in Sydney, I play guitar which you knew already, and I have a weird obsession with penguins.” Luke said simply, mimicking Ashton’s currently position—elbow son the table and head in his hands. Ashton cocked his eyebrow up in question.

“Penguins?” He asked.

“I don’t know I think they’re cute.” Luke said, as if that justified his obsession. Ashton just shrugged, not saying anything else about it. “How about you? Tell me about yourself.”

“Let’s see… I’m 20 years old, I’ve been in the carnival business for 5 years, but it was inevitable that I was going to follow in my father’s footsteps…”

“Wait,” Luke interrupted him then cringed inwardly at how rude that was. “What do you mean ‘follow in your father’s footsteps’?”

“He was a ringleader too, and so was his father. It’s a family thing, I guess. I mean, we do own the carnival.” It was then that the woman came over with their coffee, giving them a smile as she walked away.

“That must be cool to own something like that. The only thing I own is a car and college debt.” That made Ashton laugh, eyes clenched shut in a full blown laugh; Luke would be lying if he said he didn’t find that utterly adorable.

The next 30 minutes was of them talking about their lives. Since they’ve been talking non-stop over the phone, they already know a bit about each other. However, anyone else would think that they would lose things to talk about, but that wasn’t true. The boys sat there and kept talking, never missing a beat in the conversation and never running out of things to say. Luke has never been on a date like this, where it was so easy to talk to the person. Ashton was just such an interesting person. He likes the drums, but doesn’t really play them cause he never has time (with all the moving around), he has two younger siblings whom he loves dearly (Luke can tell by the way he talks about them, smiling as he retells a story about his 10 year old brother Harry getting caught in a revolving door), he can also do weird bird calls.

“Bird calls?!” Luke asked, not even stopping the laugh he lets out.

“Well, when you’re on the road all the time, you get bored easily. So one day when I was like 12, I was complaining to my dad that I was bored. So, as a joke, he tells me to go talk to the birds. But me, being a stupid pre-teen, actually went outside and started talking to the birds. I picked up on a few different birdcalls, just learning how to mimic them. After 6 years, I was able to do up to 20 different birdcalls.”

“I want to hear it.” Luke said softly, leaning forward a bit so their faces were a bit closer now. Ashton just blushed, looking anywhere besides at Luke’s face.

“Not here…” he says shyly. But Luke pouted, his bottom lip out and his eyes wide like puppy eyes. Ashton couldn’t resist. “Fine. But like I said, not in here. Follow me.” And with that, the boys paid for their coffee and walked out of the coffee shop. It was already getting late, the sky showing it’s light pinks and dark blues as the sun began to set.

They rounded the corner, heading towards the carnival, where there were a bunch of birds just there, eating crumbs off the ground. Luke turned to Ashton, who held a single finger up, silently telling the boy to hold on. Suddenly, Ashton’s voice crowed, sounding exactly like a bird’s. Luke stared in awe, listening as Ashton let out another bird call, only this time, the birds answered back.

“That’s so coo—” Luke tried to say, but Ashton hushed him again. He was standing next to the taller boy, his hand brushing over Luke’s, causing shivers to go down Luke’s spine. The effect Ashton had on him was scary, but for some reason, Luke wasn’t afraid, especially not when he was around Ashton.

Ashton crowed again, and in a blink of an eye, one of the birds flies over to the boys, landing right on Ashton’s outstretched arm. Luke gasped, backing away slightly before Ashton stopped him, grabbing Luke’s hand with the hand that was brushing against his previously. “Don’t be afraid.” Ashton whispered, his eyes never leaving the bird, but his hand never letting go of Luke’s. “He’s harmless.”

Luke relaxed, inching a bit closer as he got a good look at the bird. It was truly a beautiful bird, with its black feathers and iridescent feathers on his underside. Ashton makes another birdcall, watching as the bird begins to flip his wings, but doesn’t move from Ashton’s arm.

“Do you want to hold him?” Ashton whispers, looking up at Luke, who didn’t see cause he was too busy looking down at the bird. But when he did look up to meet Ashton’s gaze, his breath hitched in his throat. Ashton’s eyes were so bright under the light of the setting sun, showing all the specks of brown and gold in his eyes. Luke wanted nothing more than to kiss the boy at this moment, to have those lips on his and his hands combed through his curly hair.

Luke was falling in love.

“S-Sure.” He finally says, lifting his arm up so Ashton could move the bird from his arm onto Luke’s. The bird didn’t seem too happy about moving, but he got on Luke’s arm, nails digging into Luke’s arm as he held the bird. Luke let out a manic sounding laugh, his chest clenching as his laughter got harder and harder. Ashton was still holding his hand, squeezing it a bit as a smile grew on his face. He stared up at Luke, seeing him fill with glee as the bird started flipping his wings again. Luke let out a squeal, sounding like a small child, but he didn’t care.

“Amazing, isn’t it?” Ashton asked softly, giving Luke a fond filled smile. Luke just nodded, unable to form his thoughts into words. He felt like a kid again, he felt like a child that had the opportunity to live again, taking in everything he possible could in fear that he’d forget a single moment.

It wasn’t long until the bird actually flapped its wings and fly away, going towards the other birds, and leaving Luke and Ashton to themselves. Luke turned to face the shorter man, the smile never leaving from his face. “Tonight was… amazing.” Luke said.

Ashton giggled. “We only got coffee and talked. If you want amazing, I can give you amazing.” He then winked and Luke giggled, blushing deeply as he looked away for a moment. He turned back to face Ashton and smiled.

“You’re really something Ash.”

“I try.” They then stood there, silence filling the air as Luke contemplated whether he should kiss the man. He wanted to so badly, but he didn’t think that Ashton would want to, his pessimistic mind getting the best of him as he backed up.

“I should get going though.” Luke says sadly, but quickly added, “But we should hang out again.”

“Yeah, of course. Text you later?” and Luke nodded, then gave a small wave and walked towards the coffee shop again to get in his car.

~*~

“You went on a date with the ringleader?!” Calum asked in shock. The next day, Luke and Calum were hanging out, Michael couldn’t come cause he had a family gathering, so the two of the three friends decided to just order pizza and play some FIFA.

“Yes, I went on a date with Ashton.” Luke said, putting emphasis on Ashton cause he didn’t want Calum thinking he was only dating the guy cause of some “weird ringleader kink” (Calum’s words, not Luke’s). “If you even want to call it a date. We just got coffee.”

“That’s a start!” Calum cheered, his attention getting drawn to the T.V., where they were playing the game. “So, are you going to see him again?”

“I don’t know… I mean, I like him a lot but he’s leaving in three days.” The thought made Luke feel depressed. Ashton would be leaving Sydney on Thursday (the last show is Wednesday but Ashton said that it takes time to pack up). “I don’t want to date the guy if he’s going to be leaving.”

Calum frowned, hating that his friend was going through something like this. “Look buddy, if you really like Ashton as much as you say you do, I say give it a shot. You never know, and if things end badly, you can think of it as a summer fling.”

But Luke didn’t want Ashton to be a fling. He cared too much about the man to think of him as some throw away piece of garbage. He just wished that things were different; that they met on different terms and that Ashton wasn’t leaving Sydney for God knows how long.

Speaking of the man, Luke feels his phone vibrate in his pocket, getting it and seeing that it was a text from Ashton.

From: Ashton :)

hey what are you doin later? xx

To: Ashton :)

most likely playing fifa with cal , unless you have something else in mind ;)

From: Ashton :)

YOU DIRTY BOY!! that isn’t what i was gunna say at aLL! xx

To: Ashton :)

well what were you gunna say??

From: Ashton :)

do you wanna come to the show tonight ? xx

To: Ashton :)

whats in it for me? :P

From: Ashton :)

getting to see me !

To: Ashton :)

sounds perfect. what time?

From: Ashton :)

come at 5? i’ll let you into the tent early. i have a surprise for you ;)

Luke looked over at the time, seeing it read 2:06pm. Calum gave Luke a questioning look, and Luke just chuckled. “Looks like you’re alone tonight.”

“Are you serious?!” Calum cried out, and Luke just nodded, stopping the game and heading towards his room. “Dude! This is violation of every bro-code in the book!!”

“Come on Cal! I only have a few more days with Ashton.” Luke called from his room, not exactly changing but making sure he didn’t look sloppy. “After Thursday I might never see him again.”

“Oh fuck you for pulling the ‘I’ll never see him again’ card.” Calum said, getting up off the couch so he could leave.

“You’re the best Cal-Pal!”

“Yeah yeah, just be safe. Wear a condom.” Calum joked as he left the house, leaving Luke alone to get ready.

Before he knew it, it was 4:30 and Luke had to make his way to the carnival. When he got there it was almost 5, the lights were bright and the air smelt like candy and popcorn; Luke loved every bit of it. Soon enough he found the ringleader, half his costume on—only missing his hat and jacket. His hair was wild and curly, smile bright as his eyes locked onto Luke’s, and the blonde boy smiled back.

“Lukey!” Ashton called from where he was. “Come over here, I wanna show you something.”

So Luke obeyed, walking towards the man as he was lead into the tent. When they got inside, it was pitch black, the lights obviously not on since the show hasn’t started yet, but for some reason this freaked Luke out a bit. That is, until Ashton grabbed Luke’s hand and all of Luke’s worries and fears washed away. Ashton had that effect on Luke.

But once the lights came on, Luke’s eyes widened at the sight. There, in the center of the tent, was a table, covered with a white tablecloth, and decorated with a flower in the middle. There were empty plates and cups set up as well, so Luke knew automatically what this was. When he turned to look at Ashton, the man was blushing, face down as his toes dug holes into the sandy floor—like a bashful child.

“I hope this isn’t too… much. I wanted to take you out later, but I didn’t know how late it would be.” He explained, as if Luke would be anything other than happy with this.

“No, don’t worry. I love it.” Luke ensured, smiling at the shorter man. This must have given Ashton a lot more confidence, because he lead the blonde boy to his seat, pulling it out for him and pushing him in once he was seated. He then made his way to the other side of the table and sat himself down.

Not long after, the curtains opened and a woman walking on stilts comes in, holding a tray (which Luke presumed was the food). Luke just stared at fascination at the woman, giving her a kind smile as she placed the tray on the table. Ashton thanked her as she walked away.

“So, what wonderful food does the amazingly sexy Mr. Irwin have for me tonight?” Luke said playfully, leaning back in his seat comfortably.

“Well, Mr. … Luke,” it was then that Ashton realized that he had no clue what Luke’s last name was… This both increased his curiosity and made him very upset. “We will be having chicken cutlets, mashed potatoes, and green beans!” Having said that, Ashton opens up both of their trays, revealing the food. Honestly, it looked like something you would heat up in a microwave. But to Luke, it was the equivalent to a gourmet meal.

“Looks and sounds delicious. Can’t wait to try it.” And then they started eating. Like their last date, they talked about everything they possibly could talk about. So Ashton thought it would be an ok time to ask Luke his last name, for… informational reasons.

“Why do you want to know?” Luke asked, and Ashton couldn’t find anything in his voice that showed he was upset about him asking, so he responded.

“Well, I’d like to address you by your last name, like ‘Mr. Smith’ or ‘Mr. Gonzales’. I find it… attractive when you did it to me, so I wanted to return the favor.”

“When did I say your last name?” the boy asked, his head tilted in honest confusion, but Ashton was also confused cause he could have sworn he heard Luke say his last name (Irwin) just moments ago.

“Before, when you said ‘the amazingly sexy Mr. Irwin’.” Ashton said with a laugh.

It took Luke a moment to register, but once it did, his face turned red. The place is called ‘Irwin Family Carnival’, which is owned by Ashton’s family. “Why am I so stupid?!” He exclaimed, placing his face in his hands.

“Aw, you’re not stupid babe!” Ashton reassured, reaching his hand forward to touch Luke’s, making Luke slowly lift his face from his hands and stare down at their touching hands. The feeling that Luke gets when Ashton holds his hand would make grown men laugh and little girls giggle. When he finally looked up, he could see Ashton smiling kindly, as if not wanting to upset Luke. He truly felt like a child on Christmas, but the joy of opening up presents was nothing compared to the joy Luke got when he saw Ashton’s smile.

They finished their food and it was almost time for the crew to set up for the show tonight. Ashton hated that their little date was over; Luke hated it just as much. But when Ashton asked Luke to stay for the show, Luke smiled sadly and shook his head.

“I’m sorry. I kinda ditched Calum to come here, and he’s alone right now cause Mikey is with his family. And I’d be the worst friend of the century if I kept him alone.”

“It’s alright, I get that. Go have fun with your friend. I’m just… I’m happy you came, at all!” Ashton said, chuckling a bit, stopping after a few seconds with a small frown. “Thanks again. Y-You want to do something… tomorrow?”

Luke was honestly shocked. He would have thought that Ashton would be sick of him by now. Because, let’s face it, Luke is boring, pessimistic, clumsy, awkward, and way too obsessed with penguins. But Ashton wants to see him again, so who is he to say no?

“Of course.”

“Great!”

And then they were silent. The tension of what to do next was killing the two boys, both wanting it, but both not knowing if the other wanted it. They were so close to each other as well, their chests just mere millimeters apart, breath ghosting each others’ faces, eyes locked to each others’ lips. They were both silently begging for it so intensely.

It wasn’t until Ashton’s brave personality made the first move. His hand made its way up to the back of Luke’s head, pulling him down to collide their lips together. Luke was still for a moment, not knowing if he should move. But once he felt Ashton’s tongue on his bottom lip, Luke let go of everything that would hold him back, grabbing Ashton’s waist and pulling him closer. He wanted so much of “Ashton” right now, wanted to feel him, wanted to taste him, wanted him. Ashton’s hands were kneading through Luke’s hair, causing a moan from the taller boy, kissing deep as if he would die if he weren’t.

“Showtime in 30 minutes!” a man called from behind the two boys, forcing them to have to pull away so the crew can continue setting up for the show. Ashton looked at the ground, embarrassed to even meet Luke’s gaze, which was fond-filled and smiley.

“So uh-we still on for tomorrow?” Ashton asked, suddenly timid despite being the initiator to the kiss they just shared.

“Of course.” Luke said softly, causing Ashton to look up in shock. He wasn’t expecting that, honestly, thinking that Luke wouldn’t want to see the shorter man. “Text me?”

“Y-Yeah, I’ll… text you.” And with that Luke gave Ashton a smile and turned to talk away, not before turning back to give him a small wave, which Ashton returned.

~*~

The next two days were magical. Luke and Ashton spent those days just hanging out and kissing and cuddling and Luke believed he was in love. Ashton wanted Luke to come to the last show before he had to leave, which made Luke a bit sad because he was reminded that this was going to end. This thing they had going on was going to be finished tomorrow, and Luke hated thinking about that. Ashton promised he would keep in touch, but the blonde knew that that was impossible.

But instead of being depressed about tomorrow, Luke agreed to go to the matinée show today, which was at 3pm. He got dressed in a simple black tee and black skinny jeans, with a red flannel shirt tied loosely around his waist—in case he got cold. When he got to the carnival, it was way more crowded than usual, kids screaming and running around filled with excitement. Luke loved looking at the little kids, loved seeing how happy they get during the show and filled with so much wonder.

Luke then spotted Ashton in the corner, meeting the children, and it gave him a flashback to the first time he met the ringleader. Ashton looked up at the blonde and smiled, causing Luke to blush and smile as well, then went back to the kids. If there’s one thing that Luke loves more than Ashton, it’s Ashton with kids. The man knew how to make them smile, knew exactly what to do and say, and genuinely loved the response he gets from them. Luke always found himself falling more in love with the man after seeing him with kids.

Luke made his way over to the tent, sitting in his assigned seat, and waiting for the show to start. He knew he couldn’t text Ashton cause he was busy getting ready, so instead he texted Michael and Calum, who were talking about how hot they thought the lady at Starbucks was. Basically, it was a war between Michael and Calum on who was going to get the girl first.

Suddenly, the show started, and Luke turned off his phone, waiting for Ashton to get in the center. The single spotlight shone down and there stood Ashton, his full gear on, and Luke would be lying if he said he wasn’t turned on.

“Ladies, gentlemen, children, and others. I would like to say welcome to the Irwin Family Carnival. I will be your ringleader, Mr. Irwin, and tonight you will see things that will fascinate you, intrigue you, maybe even make you a bit scared. But fear not! My lovely acts are well trained and specialize in making your imagination wander!” Ashton said, repeating the same lines as he did the first night Luke saw the show.

The show went on like normal, each performance wonderful and exciting. However, just like last time, Luke’s eyes were on Ashton only, finding everything else not as wonderful as the ringleader. After each of the acts, Ashton came back on, standing in the center of the tent with his hands outstretched towards the crowd—who were cheering. Ashton gave a big smile at the crowd, then turned to Luke, who was clapping for Ashton and smiling and Ashton could feel the butterflies in his stomach. He tried to pull his gaze away from the blonde boy, but he couldn’t, so what he said next was said with his eyes locked on Luke.

“Since this is our last performance here in Sydney, I would like to call up a special person to the center of the tent. This person… has made my visit here at Syndey wonderful and… magical. I would love for all of you to meet him, and see how wonderful he is.” Luke felt his heart stop. What is he doing? Ashton walked towards Luke, never breaking their gaze on each other. Luke’s hands were shaking as Ashton came up to where Luke was sitting, arm out and hand waiting for it to be held by Luke. It wasn’t until Ashton gave Luke that small smile that he gave him the first time they met, that Luke got the courage to grab Ashton’s hand and stand up. The crowd clapped, not knowing exactly what was going on—hell, Luke had no idea.

They made their way to the center, Ashton’s hand never leaving Luke’s, and stopped once they got there. Ashton turned to face Luke, who was physically nervous under the watching eyes of the crowd. But Ashton gripped Luke’s hand, calming him down a bit.

“I just wanted to thank you for making me feel the happiest I’ve felt in a while. You are truly something, Luke Hemmings.” Luke didn’t know if it was the adrenaline running through his veins from fear, or the overwhelming feeling of love he feels for Ashton that caused him to grab the sides of the man’s face and crash his lips onto his. All he knew was that he was kissing Ashton, and the cheering from the crowd was muted; the only sounds he could hear were the faint moans coming from Ashton. But when he did pull away, he noticed the roar of the crowd, whistling, clapping, woot-ing. Luke suddenly felt embarrassed, his face turning beet red, as he looked down at Ashton, who was smiling so wide right now.

Luke’s mind was clouded with everything that was going on, that he didn’t think when he blurted out, “I love you.”

It also just so happened that Luke was by Ashton’s microphone—which was attached to his shirt—so the entire carnival heard him admit to loving the man. Ashton stood there in shock, and Luke was thinking of all the ways he could kill himself. He wasn’t supposed to say that, but with the crowd cheering, and the adrenaline pumping through his veins, and the kiss. He didn’t want to look at the ringleader, fearing that he would look angry. But when he got the courage to take a peak at Ashton, all he could see were tear filled eyes, and a smile.

“I love you too.” He said back, and that was enough for Luke to feel like he was Cloud 9. They kissed again, and again, and again, until the lights went out in the carnival and everyone went home. They kissed until the sky went from blue to pink/purple. They kissed in the center of the tent until they couldn’t kiss any longer. And it was perfect.

~*~

It’s been a year since Luke has seen Ashton.

When Ashton left that Thursday, he promised Luke he would keep in touch. And they did, for the first month. But then school was getting hard for Luke, and Ashton was busy with the carnival, and they just drifted apart.

Luke isn’t even mad that they didn’t keep in touch; he knew this was going to happen. But he would be lying if he said that for the first few weeks of not talking he wasn’t depressed. Michael and Calum had to force him to get out and not wallow in self-pity, and after a few months, Luke was himself again. He even has been on a few dates—none of them going anywhere, but it was still good to go on them.

It wasn’t until Luke was walking to the supermarket that he noticed the familiar flyer. He wanted to walk passed it, wanted to pretend that he didn’t see it. but the captivating eyes that made him want to go there in the first place were calling him in, making him walk back a few steps and look at the flyer.

COME SEE THE CARNIVAL!

OPEN FOR THIS WEEK ONLY

$15 ENTRANCE FEE

He was back. Ashton was back in Sydney and he didn’t even bother trying to contact Luke. The blonde boy was heartbroken. It was one thing to be away and not text him, but to be in his hometown and not even bother trying to talk to him hurt like hell. Still, he found himself looking into the eyes of the man he used to love—still does, but doesn’t like to admit it to himself.

Luke still went to the supermarket, but came back home to the shared aparentment he had with Michael and Calum and said nothing about finding the flyer. The flyer said that there was going to be a show tonight, and Luke was contemplating going. However, he didn’t want his friends to prevent him from going just because Ashton was going to be there. He loved his friends, but he couldn’t have them baby him anymore. He wanted to see Ashton, to see why he stopped calling, to see what made him not care about Luke anymore.

“Hey Lukey, you back already?” Calum called from living room. Luke shook himself out of his thoughts and smiled.

“Yeah, I even got you your Krave cereal.” He said, placing said cereal on the counter, causing Calum to get up and gape at the cereal as if it was holy.

“You’re the best Lukey!” Calum cheered, hugging the boy from behind. Luke chuckled, patting Calum’s hand, which was over his stomach.

“Yeah yeah, I know.” He unwrapped himself from Calum’s arms and headed for his room. He was still thinking about going to the carnival. He just really wanted to see Ashton, he won’t go over to him, he just needs to see him again.

“Hey, Cal…” he called out to his friend.

“Yeah?”

“So… um… I don’t know if you knew but uh-the carnival is back. And I was thinking… of going…” Luke said weakly, waiting to hear Calum’s protests. Just as he expected, Calum came rushing into Luke’s room, his eyes wide with shock, and his head shaking no.

“No no no! Luke, you can’t! You can’t do that to yourself! He left you and never bothered to keep in contact, you can’t just go and see him!” Calum said quickly.

“I know, but… I feel like I need to see him. One more time. For closure purposes.” Luke looked down, only hearing Calum’s sigh as he walked closer to the blonde.

“Fine, if you think it will give you closure, you can go. But nothing else Luke, I’m serious! That man doesn’t deserve someone as wonderful as you if he thinks he can just get up and leave like that!” Luke could feel his smile growing, but he tried to maintain it, not wanting to look so excited. But when Calum left the room, he let his smile grow big. He was going to see Ashton again!

That was when the crushing pain filled his body. What if Ashton didn’t want to see him?

~*~

Luke was walking into the carnival when he saw him. He was with the children again, his smile bright and wide as they rambled on about things they found important. And Ashton listened to them, making them believe that what they said had meaning, and making them feel special. Everything he did to the blonde boy last year. He tried not to let all this get to him, and he didn’t want Ashton to see him yet, so he made his way over to the snacks, getting popcorn, then walking around a bit. He saw some of the games that they had set up, walking passed them as nostalgia filled him. Luke then saw Ashton heading for his dressing room, and he figured it was now or never.

Luke walked over to the curtain, pulling it open so he could go inside, then knocked on a plank of wood that held the tent open.

“Yes?” Ashton said, turning around, only to freeze with his mouth open as he looked at the boy that stood before him. Luke bit his lower lip, playing with his lip ring, as he looked at Ashton with worried eyes. “Luke…” Ashton said breathlessly.

“Yeah… it’s me.” He didn’t know what else to say. He wanted to ask him why he didn’t tell him he was coming back to Sydney, but at the same time, he probably forgot about him. That is, until he saw the way the ringleader was looking at Luke.

“I-I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault you had to leave.” Luke said honestly, ignoring the way his heart clenched in his chest.

“I still should have called or texted. I just figured you didn’t want to see me anymore cause we lost touch months ago and I—”

“Why did you think I didn’t want to see you?” Luke asked, confused that the man would even think that.

“Because we lost touch, and I never texted you back.” Ashton sounded so small, like he was afraid that Luke was going to snap at the smaller man. But Luke didn’t do any such thing; instead he walked closer to Ashton, closing the space between them as he hugged Ashton.

“I still love you Ashton.” Luke confessed, his arms wrapped tightly around the smaller man. He was unable to see Ashton’s eyes tearing up as he held onto the taller boy, face buried into the crook of his neck.

“I still love you too Luke.” And Luke felt the butterflies in his stomach again, the same feeling he got when Ashton first told him he loved him. Their moment was short lived though, because Ashton had to get ready for the show. They let go of each other, Ashton tilting his head in a questioning manner as he asked, “Are you staying for the show?”

“Of course.” Luke said with a smile.

“Great.” Then Ashton pulled Luke down for a kiss. The feeling of fireworks never came, but something even better did: Luke felt warm inside, as did Ashton. This warm feeling took over their entire body as their lips moved against each other’s. They kissed for what felt like years, making up for lost time, and Luke loved it.


End file.
